She wouldn't look at the camera. I understand...I think. Their visit was so hard. She spent most of her time on the couch.October is breast cancer awareness month. I'm not a fan of any cancer but breast cancer is something that is near and dear to my family and heart.
My parent's divorced when my bothers and sister and I were very young. We were raised by our step parents. Our dad remarried, soon, to Christine, she was a social worker for the state of Kansas. We always called her Big Christine and me Little Christine :) My dad and Big Christine were married for 26 years when we got 'that' call. All us kid's got a call telling us that Christine had found a lump and and underwent surgery after just three days of finding the lump. We have no one in our immediate family who has ever had anything.........like cancer. It was so so hard to take. From what I knew of cancer, at the time, people who were healthy didn't get cancer. Remember, I had no one remotely close to me that had cancer, I cared but I never put another thought into it. Christine was so healthy, she was. She would 'preach' to my sister and I about our weight's and encourage us to get healthy. She was into being fit and eating right. She was a HUGE influence at Gold's Gym, her absolute favorite!. Christine had friends, LOT'S of friends.
After that day, you know, after we got 'the call' about cancer, my whole world changed. I never thought about cancer again the same, still do not. Christine and I had a close relationship. I was close to my mother, Susan as well, and I was close to my step mom Christine. Her battle wasn't easy......obviously she was fighting cancer. ~I hate cancer. I hate cancer.~ She never ever gave up, she was a fighter. If you know Big Christine, right now in your head you are thinking, HELL YES she was a fighter!!
One night, after her normal day at work and her normal work out at Gold's she came home and was stretching. She was in the bedroom, stretching, she'd taken her top and bra off and was in front of the mirror. All of a sudden she turned to the left and saw a huge lump sticking out of the side of her breast, ( she was not a big woman at all) very very fit. She said she stood there and Just. Could. Not. Breath., she said. Three days later, she had surgery and was diagnosed with late stage three breast cancer.
From there her battle was.....it was a battle, it was a fight FOR HER LIFE, it was absolute HELL for me and I can't even imagine what she was thinking or going through. I called a lot and having to hear that her cancer had spread here and there and here and there.........f*cking pissed me off. ~I hate cancer~ She just could not get a break.
On the third year of her fight for life, I got the call that she had lesions on her brain and on her bones and lungs etc. I don't have a word to describe it. There is no word to describe it. All I could think of was her and what she must have been thinking. ~God, I hate cancer~ Even after her diagnoses, she kept a strict diet, very strict and was positive about her outlook on life.
My dad and Big Christine came out to see us for Christmas in Texas. My wonderful in laws and brother-in-law were there as well. Best Christmas ever. Christine's a twin, YES a twin! She is also the second youngest out of NINE kids :) Ernie, her twin, still lives in Texas. Her baby sister Marilyn, hubby and Christine's dad all came to my house for Christmas day to hang out and celebrate!!!
I flew out to see my Dad and Christine two months later, to help out. My dad had MS so I just wanted to do what I could to be there. I took Deven with me, he was just 6 months old and I was still breast feeding him. I will not go into details about Christine's health at the time.
One month later, April 6th, 2008, Christine died from breast cancer.
I check my breast alot. All I can do is learn from what Christine went through, right. So, if I can learn something then hopefully I can share my story and help just ONE person learn, at the least.
"I never thought it would happen to me," is the worst WORST buuuuut most realistic saying ever. Be aware.
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